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Twin Flame Theory: Does This Connection Exist?

What is a twin flame connection?

By Zoë O'Connor

on January 30, 2024

Read time: 10 mins

by Moraya Seeger DeGeare

Fairytales tell always be on the lookout for our soulmate, as our twin flame is out there somewhere, waiting to start your love story.

Whether or not you believe in the concept of twin flames, as there is no concrete idealogy behind the theory, it’s certainly a romantic idea.

So what is a twin flame? Are twin flames the same as soulmates? And more importantly, how do you know if you’ve found your soulmate in your current relationship? Buckle up, because we’ve uncovered some of the truths about twin flame connections right here.

What is a twin flame?

A twin flame is an age-old concept that describes a unique and profound type of soul connection between two individuals.

The concept of twin flames is based on the belief that before entering our physical world, one soul splits into two, taking on two separate lives and destinies. Even though they were split apart, these two ‘twins’ are believed to be destined to find each other.

If you believe in this concept, you’re happy to hand the reigns of your love life to fate and trust that certain twin flame signs will appear in order to guide you to your true love.

According to this theory, if you’re lucky enough to find your twin flame, you will experience an instantaneous and intense connection. This rush of emotion is meant to be greater than just love at first sight, with twin flames said to experience instant recognition when they meet for the first time — even if they don’t know why they feel such a magnetic attraction.

Also known as ‘mirror souls’, these relationships are often defined by intense emotions and life-changing challenges. Similar to karmic relationships, these tumultuous encounters are meant to inspire spiritual growth in both partners.

How do you know if someone is your twin flame?

Immediate recognition: Upon meeting your twin flame, an instant connection takes place, where you feel like this person is your kindred spirit — even though you’ve just met!

Intense attraction: On top of a deep soul connection, twin souls feel an intense attraction for their counterparts. This magnetic pull isn’t just about physical attraction but can also be an emotional and spiritual draw towards your romantic partner.

Shared life experiences: Twin flames might feel like they’ve had similar life experiences, or that their stories align on different levels. For example, even if they were raised in completely different environments, they’ve gone through similar challenges.

Deep compatibility: Twin flame love is about connecting with your partner on a deeper soul level, with an intense spiritual bond forming almost instantly.

Challenges: Due to the intensity of the connection, these relationships are often fraught with various challenges and hurdles. These relationships bring to the surface past traumas and issues, with twin flames often going through several break-ups and make-ups.

Sense of completion: When you’re reunited with your twin flame, you naturally feel more whole, or like a ‘complete’ version of yourself when they’re around.

What is the purpose of a twin flame?

This spiritual connection between two people is said to have innumerable effects on both individual's journeys.

According to this theory, true twin flames are reunited in order to achieve a shared mission or common purpose. Therefore, even though this life path may be challenging, this kind of relationship is meant to catalyze deep personal transformation.

When twin flames meet, the instant connection brings up a sense of synchronicity and purpose but it also highlights any insecurities or issues in your life. As your twin flame shows you your reflection, it forces you to deal with any unprocessed trauma, from both this life and your past life.

Being faced with your true self, in the eyes of your twin soul, can be a very intense experience — with your partner catalyzing your own personal transformation. This kind of inner work can trigger challenges and conflict, but even if this drives you apart in the short term, it’s all part of your spiritual journey.

While twin flames are largely seen in romantic relationships, these soul connections can also manifest in deep friendships, family relationships, or other non-romantic bonds. Overall, this concept believes that there are no coincidences and that these types of relationships are foundational to who you are.

Stages of a twin flame relationship

Yearning: Before you’re reunited with your twin flame, you feel incomplete. People might experience a longing or a yearning feeling before they meet this person — often viewed as a premonition that someone special is about to come into their lives.

Meeting: When you meet your twin soul, you experience an intense emotional connection right from the outset. Unlike love at first sight, you might feel like you’ve been waiting for this person to enter your life.

Honeymoon period: After you meet your twin flame, you enter a honeymoon phase where you’re intent on learning everything about each other and start to fall in love. This deepening connection can lead to a feeling of euphoria and completion — that this person is all you wanted and more!

Challenges: Once the rose-tinted glasses of early love wear off, you can start to notice each other's flaws, and this exposure can lead to a lot of challenges. Even though this stage is difficult for couples, it’s all meant to feed your overall spiritual growth.

The chase: In this relationship dynamic, each individual takes on their own roles at this stage — the runner and the chaser. The runner is disheartened by the constant turmoil and conflict, distancing themselves from the relationship for the sake of their mental health, while the chaser tries to fix things before it’s too late.

Resolution: After the tough period, the pairing eventually surrenders to a new relationship dynamic. As they work out their differences, they resolve to preserve their unconditional love and avoid any toxic tendencies. Through healing, they can grow stronger together as a couple.

Are twin flames meant to be together?

If you believe in the concept of twin flames, it makes sense that these souls are meant to be together forever — having found their soulmate or true love against all the odds.

While some people believe that twin flames are destined to be together, others will liken this dynamic to a karmic relationship. In this way, these twin souls should come into each others’ lives to act as a catalyst for growth and self-discovery, but they don’t necessarily have to end up together.

This kind of ending doesn’t make the relationship any less impactful, nor does it counteract their status as your twin flame. Even though your similarities make you very compatible, life can step in to bring us down a separate path.

Are twin flames seen as a healthy dynamic?

Due to their intensity and turmoil, many people would view twin-flame relationships as volatile and potentially toxic.

However, unlike karmic relationships, this dynamic eventually settles into a healthy pattern once healing and growth have taken place. Once these layers have been peeled away, it can reveal a happy and healthy relationship, with intense intimacy, emotion, and connection.

Even though people like the concept of the twin flame theory, it has not been scientifically proven and is best approached with caution.

Twin flame theory can glorify codependent relationships, with both individuals required to be together in order to feel whole. While your partner may be your best friend, it’s not healthy to advocate for this mentality — especially if it isolates you from your family members or friends.

The key to any relationship is balance, and it’s not healthy to have such an intense dynamic at all times. No matter your connection, it’s important to put boundaries in place to ensure that you are both comfortable and that the relationship is progressing at a healthy pace.

For example, if you’re in a toxic relationship, you may excuse certain behaviors if you believe they’re just a part of your twin flame journey. Even if you feel like you’ve found your soulmate, be mindful of love-bombing and running away with the intensity of your emotions.

If your partner is exhibiting worrying or overly intense behavior and is pressuring you to do things you’re not comfortable with, it’s okay to take a step back. Or, if you feel you need extra help, speak to a professional to ensure things are on the right track.